One of the Pizza for Porn pictures I drew tonight, for slumberfish. They asked for pizza delivery boy Dave and John. Thank you my dear!
egberts smooching because the tag broke
Have you learned your lesson, lad?
so Faun and I decided to redraw each other’s old art without telling each other which piece we did! Here’s mine ehehhee
john wets the bed until he is eleven years old and whenever it happened he would go into his dad’s room crying and dad would take care of him and clean him up and let him sleep with him
one night he has a wet dream but mistakes it for peeing so he goes to his dad’s room and dad is cleaning him up and
wait that’s not pee
he asks john if he remembers his dream and john nods but doesn’t want to tell dad about it and dad understands so he finished cleaning him up and lets him sleep with him
except that john can’t sleep because he remembers every detail of his dream vividly and it’s starting to have an effect on his lower region so he just barely touches his dick and wow that feels good and he does it again and again and he’s breathing heavily trying not to make any sounds because his dad is sleeping right next to him and if his dad finds out what john was dreaming about then that would be the end of life as he knew it so he’s trying to be really quiet
but dad is awake the whole time and he’s listening as john touches himself in his bed and he’s listening as john makes the cutest sounds while trying to be quiet and he’s listening as john whispers ‘dad’ before coming in his underwear
dad pretends to be asleep when john sneaks out of the bed to go to the bathroom again
wAIT NO it gets better
bro is a little too friendly of a monster who lives under john’s bed
and dave in this au lives with the lalondes
and you know that whole spiel dave goes on about how he wishes parents would believe their kids about like idk vampires or whatever
well after a spiel like that john is all
wow i can just tell dave he’ll believe me and won’t think i’m crazy!!!
so he informs dave that there’s this monster that’s been living under his bed and creeping out every so often at night and stuff
and dave is like okay sure i believe you. but what does he do does he hurt you what’s his problem
and john is like
how do i even tell my best friend that this monster dude (who really just looks like a normal dude when it comes down to it but wow incredibly hot) just comes out from under my bed to flirt with me and…stuff
so he’s like nvm forget it
but he winds up telling dave eventually anyway
and dave is like haha wow buddy those are just wet dreams omg i can’t believe you got me all curious and concerned over your fucked up wet dreams
(haha wow what if just plain old dirk was a monster too and he came to visit dave and then suddenly dave completely believes john ah god bless stridercest)
edit: also like in little monsters the monsters have to shrink away from light
so sometimes when john is fed up with bro’s bullshit even if they’re in the middle of something sexual he’ll just turn the bedside lamp on and bro is like fUCK goddammit because he was about to GET SOME
wait more editing:
bro’s goal is basically to just drag john under the bed and have his way with him all the time but john is like hahahaha yeah no not a chance
(they do go under the bed a few times with promises that john can go back, though. bro is an honest monster despite his wicked intent. anyway, it’s pretty awesome under there and john has to admit he’s tempted but yEAH NOPE bro try again you frickin’ loser)
stop wriggling, dave, you’re gonna like it!
Rock me. X
A commission I drew a while back, that I really liked. I think Dad’s pipe was my favorite part.
JOHN, ARE THOSE—
they sure are, old man. like ‘em?
THEY ARE DOWNRIGHT UNCOUTH.